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 Post subject: A TRIP TO COSTCO
PostPosted: Mon Jun 28, 2010 8:38 am 
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A TRIP TO COSTCO


Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina

Dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the

checkout line when woman behind me asked if I had a dog.


What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have

little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I

was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't,

because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50

pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes

coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that

it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat

one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so

it works well and I was going to try it again.. (I have to

mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my

story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the

dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an

Irish Setter's ass and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was

laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore.

Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the

world to think of crazy things to say.

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 Post subject: Re: A TRIP TO COSTCO
PostPosted: Mon Jun 28, 2010 10:23 am 
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Oh you are funny.

You should try that and see what happens. :drunken:

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 Post subject: Re: A TRIP TO COSTCO
PostPosted: Mon Jun 28, 2010 3:44 pm 
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:lol: I like shopping at Costco too much! :mrgreen:

Besides, I'd never be able to keep a straight face to pull it on someone...I'm the worst teller of jokes in the world. I either forget the punch line, fail to deliver it effectively, or else I end up laughing so hard before the joke is finished I make a fool of myself. :alien:

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"Behind every great fortune lies a great crime."
Honore de Balzac

"Democrats work to help people who need help.
That other party, they work for people who don't need help.
That's all there is to it."

~Harry S. Truman


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 Post subject: Re: A TRIP TO COSTCO
PostPosted: Mon Jun 28, 2010 5:41 pm 
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Ha. I'm a bad joke teller too. That was still pretty funny.
:lol:

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 Post subject: Re: A TRIP TO COSTCO
PostPosted: Tue Jun 29, 2010 5:36 pm 
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Ladies—

I posted this to my FaceBook page. All the responses there assume I am literally telling a true story. After the title, I added “(a little comic relief).” I haven’t decided whether to enlighten them that this is a relatively old joke circulating around the internet.

APL

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 Post subject: Re: A TRIP TO COSTCO
PostPosted: Tue Jun 29, 2010 9:41 pm 
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:lol: :lol: :lol: Ironically, I WAS at Costco today...buying food in preparation for my son and his family's visit. They should arrive on Saturday evening to stay for a week. But I did think of this joke while checking out. 8)

I'm glad you're getting some mileage out of it, APL...These old jokes are like fashions and some types of music...they just keep coming back around and become popular with new generations. Imagine how much good music would have never been heard by the younger set if not for satellite radio? I LOVE to listen to 40s music...

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"Behind every great fortune lies a great crime."
Honore de Balzac

"Democrats work to help people who need help.
That other party, they work for people who don't need help.
That's all there is to it."

~Harry S. Truman


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