Sasha,

I can still remember the day that we got you.

We were on a trip to NY to visit my sister who had found you in a ditch, to young to be away from your mother. They just threw you away.

How or why my sister found you, who know's, it was just meant to be. My sister could not take another animal in so she asked if we would take you.

At first I refused. Our place was so small and I knew that you were going to be a pretty big dog. This did not deter my wife however. She fell in love with you the minute she saw you, floppy ears and no coordination, even I have to admit just how adorable you were.

My wife won, we became your human adoptive parents.

As we watched you grow, I can look back now and laugh at some of the trouble you caused. As all puppies, you were both inquisitive and my word, did you like to chew. Table's, rugs, beds, it did not matter. I will never forget the time you got an envelope that was sitting on the counter and tore it to shreds. Inside were concert tickets that we were going to see that night. The most amazing thing about that was that as you grabbed the envelope, the tickets slid out of the envelope and were sitting on the counter. It was only the envelope.

As you grew and matured, you became a great companion. You were our guardian and our friend, our comforter and our stability. It never mattered to you. You were always happy and tail wagging when you would see us. Even in your old age, this never changed. You may not have gotten up as quickly to greet us, but greet us you did.

Some people may consider it odd for me to consider you a part of our family, our child. Its not. You were my baby and I can say with an honest heart that I loved you.

You were a blessing to us and no matter the loss that I feel at this moment, I will never forget the joy that you brought into our life.

A little over an hour ago I had to let them put you down. I did not want to be there for it, but I had to. In some small way I hope that as the light faded from your eyes, I allowed this because the pain you were suffering was not worth any selfish desires on my part. I wonder if you realized just how much I loved you.

Even laying there, barely able to move, when I entered into the room your tail wagged and you lifted your head. Even in this moment you were happy to see me. After we said our last words to you and I went to get the doctor, my wife, your human mother said that you looked for me. You did not want me to leave.

I am so sorry my love, my friend. Soon the pain will fade but in this I promise you. The memory never will. You brought us much joy and I can only hope that in some small way, over these past 13 years I was able to return even a tiny bit of the joy that you brought.

Your eyes are closed now, in the eternal sleep. I will miss you dearly.

Sasha passed at 2:55 today. My heart weeps.

CrimsonEagle

Oh, CE..I am SO SORRY! How my heart aches for you and for everyone in your family who loved Sasha.

PLEASE go HERE It's a very helpful site and I know you will find some comfort there. I did when both Ty Ling and Mozzy died.

((((((((((hugs to you, CE...))))))))

Thank you very much Cat.

I know that most have lost a pet. This is our first.

Unfortunatly, we cant have children so we both accepted that she was our child.

We knew this day would come. It was really amazing to us how quickly she went downhill. Last week she was fine. Starting sat. she started acting a little funny and we really thought nothing of it, figured she was just having a bad day. By tuesday when I left for work in the morning, I knew that I was watching her die before my eyes.

The Vet said that she would only live a few more weeks at the most and she would continue to deteriorate. I just couldnt do that to her:(

I will grieve a bit, but then eventually I will not so much remember the loss as to what it was that we gained while she was with us.

Even still, I realize just how lucky I am. Just wish I could stop these bouts of crying, but that will come to pass.

Once again, thank you very much. Hug's are always welcome:)

(((((Hugs you back))))))

I understand completely.



So does mine.

Thank you shoe.

Eventually I will weep no more. Will just take some time.

Crimson

Please don't worry about the tears falling fast and furiously, CE. I still cry for Ty Ling and he's been gone for three years. I cry fresh tears for Mozzy, as he's only been gone a few weeks. .

Just know that your TVNL family are crying with you, too. Sasha had very special parents in you and in your good lady wife. Love like that knows no boundaries. Sasha had to have known that. She died peacefully and mercifully. But her love for you and yours for her will never die.

CE and Catherine,

Our pets usually have much shorter lifespans, as compared to we humans.

The bad thing is, they leave us much too soon. The good thing is, they leave us before we die.

They are always our children. They never grow up and go out on their own.

It's better that they die before those who love and take care of them. To me, the alternative is unbearable.

After I die, my children will somehow make their way. Of course, I worry all the time about what sort of world they will inherit from our folly.

With pets, you never know what situation they will end up in.

My father is 72, his wife is 75. They have two cats who are middle age. They told us they will never have any more pets, because they can't stand the idea of not knowing what would happen to their pets if they died first.

I am so sorry CE. I understand your pain. The last dog (sadie) I had to put to sleep is when I decided I didn't want another pet. It hurts too much. Of course, I will eventually get another one.

We all need a good cry every now and then. Even after death our pets often give up something we may be needing. A cleansing of the soul.

We are sorry for you loss.

TuT + Gurl Dog

CE, my heart aches for you. I have been through this so many times...but you NEVER get used to it.

Soon you will concentrate on all Sasha had she would never have had without you and your wife. You will remember all you had you would never have had without her.

I have no problem thinking of pets as 'our children'. They are dependent, loving, and such a huge part of our lives.

I have had pets all of my life, and I remember every one of them. They all leave their paw prints on our hearts.

You were Sasha's sunshine--that is what is important. And you did the right thing by not making her suffer any more than necessary.

I hope your suffering will be short--your memories of the good days will be long.

I too am very sorry for your loss CE.

Everything that has been said from TVNL members expresses my feelings exactly.

You will eventually, remember all the good things Sasha contributed to your family and enjoy every memory.

Peace

I would like to thank you all, from the bottom of my heart, for all your kind words.

I am doing better. Still sad, but better.

The next day, I don't know how do describe what it was like other than the word's surreal. The world was different. Like I said, I don't know how to put it.

I still keep getting flashes of memory of when we walked into the room where she was and her wagging her tail and trying to get up to greet me:( I don't know how long it will take for that memory to fade, or at least the pain of it to fade. In time, all will be good. Its not too bad right now, just that tinge of sadness that wont let go.

Tut, when I seen the picture of Gurl dog, between the bout of fresh tears, I thought what a beautiful dog and you guys are lucky to have each other.

This is what it all boils down to with our pets isn't it, if we are good people. We give them love and a good life, and they return this in their own way, bringing us happiness and comfort that they will always be happy to see us no matter the troubles of our world.

Once again, I would like to thank you all for sharing with me. This is what friends do, no matter our differences we hold each other up in times of distress.

Although I have never met any of you, I'm glad to call you friends.

Thank you.

CrimsonEagle.

Thank you, friend.

We are all in this together, aren't we...

You don't want it to fade, CE...keep the memories and the sadness will be the only thing that fades. You will smile later on when you remember things like this...I promise. You will be so glad you held onto the memories.

You're a very good writer...may I suggest that you sit down and write an OPETUARY...an obituary for Sasha. I've done that for each of the pets I've lost and it helps so much. It seems to lend dignity to their passing. We do it for humans, and we should do it for our animal friends, as well.

Go to the Magic Carpet and write about Sasha...poems, thoughts, stories, whatever you want to.

I wish I knew how to post photos of my pets here at TVNL...maybe TUT can tell us how.

As each day passes, the sadness will diminish. There will be "swell-ups," times when the grief will overwhelm you and make you feel like you're back to the day Sasha died, but eventually they, too, will become less frequent. Then, you will be able to remember Sasha with those smiles.

If you have pictures on your computer, download them to Photobucket.

http://photobucket.com/

Once you have them on that website, you can put cut and paste the IMG Code into your posts.

CE, how about posting a pictue of Sasha for us?