oh well , it was just a matter of time before NBC Universal claimed copyright and had Youtube take it down. Oh well !
Here's a videocam version at one of Patton Oswalt's comedy standup acts:
"...Patton Oswalt: there’s nothing to say here, really, except that he’s damn funny, even when not saying anything. A tubby elf with a faux-hawk: can you think of anything more voluminous in hilarity? And he’s got witty comments to back him up! The set was a mix of new jokes and material from his album Werewolves and Lollipops. He started out with commentary on his figure, which he describes as “B-word fat,” or the kind of fat where you say “B” very distinctively. Oswalt demonstrated this effectively with a tirade about Belinda’s beautiful baubles, and followed up with a dream about bathing in Nilla wafers.
Aside from Nilla wafers, JetBlue is Oswalt’s new love, because they distract you from flying with buckets of cookies and salty snacks—as well as 50 channels of reality television. He theorized that these accoutrements drop your IQ enough to make you not care about the implausibility of air flight—and the total lack of effective safety equipment on board. Oswalt doesn’t think a “seatbelt and a floaty thing” will save anyone in a 35,000 foot drop, and he’s probably right. Oswalt also pondered turbulence, wondering why we all feel the need to look out the window when the ride gets bumpy. Is there something we’re going to notice or do about the turbulence? If we observe the proper phenomena, will we walk out on the wing to fix whatever’s disturbing our reality TV enjoyment and spilling our Doritos? Not likely.
In addition to watching reality television on airplanes, Oswalt has recently been re-watching all the Bond films. He observed in Dr. No that “they had Bond music before they knew what to do with it,” describing a hotel unpacking scene complete with punchy theme music. The joke demonstrated Oswalt’s skills in observational comedy and his effective delivery. Another comic mocking Bond theme music might have tackled the same topic unsuccessfully, but Patton took it all the way, imitating the Bond song and adding breathy exclamations like “He brought his own soap!” Really running with a joke and giving it all the right embellishments are what set Oswalt apart from other comics.
Oswalt’s grandmother won’t die, despite her family’s unhealthy habits of deep frying scotch, melting a Milky Way on top, and wrapping it in bacon. Patton theorizes that this part of his family has built up a “death tolerance” and that even the Grim Reaper doesn’t know what to do about it: “I’m not made of heart attacks!” He wondered whether, as in Highlander, the last grandparent gets superpowers.
Observing that Bush jokes are the easiest things to tell on stage these days, Oswalt gave the topic his own twist, describing Dubya fans from 2000 as “like Creed fans,” lamenting the downfall of their idol. He also compared George W. to the Velvet Underground, in that Bush thinks his presidency won’t be understood until 100 years from now. We just don’t get him, man.
Riffing on God, Oswalt described religion as necessary to protect us all from dumb, violent people. He theorized that cavemen came up with “the sky cake trick,” promising their violent brethren that a dude in the sky would give them cake after death if they behaved while alive. Impressively, the brutes bought it, and to this day, the lure of posthumous dessert continues to convince people they should treat each other well. Expanding on the religious theme, Oswalt described the New Testament as something that a bunch of TV writers would come up with during a late-night brainstorming session. When God became boring, they had to give him an interesting “hippie son” who “hangs with hookers and does magic tricks.” To punch it up even more, they killed off the son, gave him superpowers, and let him hang with a ghost bird. That’s the makings of a successful series.
We don’t want to give away Oswalt’s masterful closing remarks, but suffice to say they involved a delicious new twist on his old standard mocking the KFC Famous Bowl. If you missed him last night, head down to Providence Monday evening; he'll be performing at Lupo's Heartbreak Hotel for a pretty affordable price.
AltCom was a pants-wetting success, and deserves to become an annual tradition. We’ll be there next year, with Depends on.
By Kerry Skemp in Arts & Events."