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 Post subject: LISTEN UP, ALL YOU MEN!
PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 7:38 am 
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IF YOU'RE A FELLOW WHO HAS TROUBLE LISTENING, READ ON:

In a Chicago hospital, a gentleman had made several attempts to get into the men's restroom, but it had always been occupied.

A nurse noticed his predicament.

Sir, she said " You may use the ladies room if you promise not to touch any of the buttons on the wall."

He did what he needed to, and as he sat there he noticed the buttons he had promised not to touch.

Each button was identified by letters: WW , WA , PP, and a red one labeled ATR .

Who would know if he touched them?

He couldn't resist. He pushed WW. warm water was sprayed gently upon his bottom. What a nice feeling, he thought. Men's restrooms don't have nice things lke this.

Anticipating greater pleasure, he pushed the WA button. Warm air replaced the warm water, gently drying his underside.

When this stopped, he pushed the PP button. A large powder puff caressed his bottom adding a fragile scent of spring flower to this unbelievable pleasure.. The ladies restroom was more than a restroom, it was tender loving pleasure.

When the powder puff completed its service, he couldn't wait to push the ATR button which he knew would be supreme ecstasy.

Next thing he knew he opened his eyes in a hospital bed, and a nurse was staring down at him.

"What happened?" he exclaimed. The last thing I remember was pushing the ATR button.

"The button ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover", said the nurse. "Your penis is under your pillow."

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 8:23 am 
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Cat—
There exists in you a mean streak that I wish could be unleashed directly on the War Chimp and his cabal of war criminals. Remind me never to get on your bad side. This story has me suffering sympathy pains even though I know it to be fiction.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 10:41 am 
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Ouch!

What a visual!

Shiver me timbers! :sad1:

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 Post subject: WW - WA - PP - ATR
PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2008 3:42 pm 
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Thank you Cat. I read it several times and laughed so hard each time I had to clear my eyes of the tears - to see.

This has the Airplane Crash beat by miles. Thank you - I needed the laugh.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 11:52 pm 
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:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Hang on, APL and PT...I think the nurse in that story was much meaner than I could ever be. She was so matter-of-fact talking about the man's penis being under his pillow. Where were the surgeons who should've at least tried to re-attach it? Seems to me the fellow has a "target rich environment" for a lawsuit against the hospital... :wink:

deeann...glad you got a kick out of this one...more might be forthcoming. :P

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"Behind every great fortune lies a great crime."
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"Democrats work to help people who need help.
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That's all there is to it."

~Harry S. Truman


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 Post subject: Great American and Democratic Dream
PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 1:43 am 
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Three guys, George Bush Jr., Osama bin Ladin and Obama were out walking together one day.

They came across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.
"I will give each of you one wish, that's three wishes total," says the Genie.

George Bush says, I have had a really rough eight years as the president.
Now that my my tenter is over I would like to live in a place where I would never have to be around a lot of people again - just be able to be around a lot of water and relax.

With a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' the day after BUSH'S tenure he is to have his wish granted.

Osama bin Ladin was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around Afghanistan, so that no infidels, Jews or American Democrats can come into our precious state."

Again, with the blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' there was a hugh wall around Afghanistan.

Obama (who knew a little about engineering) asks, "I'm curious. Please tell me more about this wall." The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15,000 feet high, 500 feet thick and completely surrounds the country; nothing can get in or out ---- virtually impenetrable."

Obama says, send Bush Jr in to visit then --- "Fill it with water."



Old joke - a few name changes to fit out present day people. LOL


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 1:52 am 
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Catherine wrote:
Where were the surgeons who should've at least tried to re-attach it?


This reminded me of the old joke:

What did Jeffery Dahlmer say to Lorena Bobbitt?
"You gonna eat that or what?"

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 2:04 pm 
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:lol: :lol: :lol:
:lol: :lol: :lol:
Fist Bumps to APL and DEEANN!

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"Behind every great fortune lies a great crime."
Honore de Balzac

"Democrats work to help people who need help.
That other party, they work for people who don't need help.
That's all there is to it."

~Harry S. Truman


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