TV News LIES

Based on news reports we're all seeing, hearing, and reading, there is an epic amount of hand-wringing going on in every media office, cubicle, and cubbyhole.

It's especially impressive that so many intricate, flailing hand motions can be maintained, all while your feet and legs are dancing as fast as they possible can, all around not saying what you mean.

You see, Paul Ryan has been using the English language again.  As usual, he is not interested in using that language to shed any light on plans and facts, but on maiming and hiding them as best he can.

You may be noticing some of these pieces feel as if you've read them before.  In a manner of speaking, you have.  It's on the order of one-size-fits-all, since any lie fits almost any Republican, and vice-versa.

Today's example:  The Romney campaign is running an ad about welfare that uses absolutely no facts -- just lies. Nothing but lies.  The campaign says it's their most effective ad yet, and no, they're not at all concerned the ad has no basis whatever in fact.

A Romney pollster was quoted as saying,  "We're not going to let our campaign be dictated by fact-checkers."  That level of outlandish, outrageous behavior is simply stunning -- lying, then bragging about it, and then being proud of it, too.

Tropical Storm Isaac's moist, warm winds increased speed to 70 miles per hour late today, just 4 mph short of a hurricane -- which is anywhere from 293 to 449 mph short of the hot-air wind-speed records that blowhards will achieve at this year's Republican parr-tee in Tampa.

In all, 2,286 delegates and 2,125 alternate delegates have gathered in one spot -- since quarantined by the Combined National Emergency Weather and Mental Health Centers, and dubbed a dangerous depression -- one not curable by anti-psychotic medications.

One plank of the Republican platform to be presented in Tampa is a demand for a return to the gold standard. This little bit of crazy is apparently intended to placate the Libertarian delegates that support Ron Paul. I've heard that they actually have enough votes to keep Romney from being nominated. This would explain them moving the official nomination from the traditional Wednesday session to Monday.

You know something is up because the habitual liars didn't use the excuse of the Wrath of God bearing down on Tampa for the sudden change, but claim it was always the schedule. (it has always been done this way, and we've always been at war with East Vagina)

Update on our universe's intersection with the Bizarro realm's version:  Effects continue to ripple and pulse outward in huge waves, like pychosis-tsunami wannabes.

Researchers say the impact is anywhere from as little as a two percent increase in most lifeforms, to as much as three quadrillion percent as severe in Republicans, based on observable behaviors and statements, not on any increased understanding as yet of the phenomenon itself.

It's been quite a while since we've written, and seemingly even longer since we've written anything intelligent or intelligible -- nothing that wasn't scrawled in blood and abruptly shoved into your view.  Certainly nothing much worth reading.

After a Constitution, Bill of Rights, and assorted amendments, we may be intellectually exhausted.  You have to admit, that was a stretch of extraordinary thinking, imagining such lofty thoughts as being worth a go by mere human beings.

Of course, founding this country on genocide and slavery are facts that have kept many of us up, late at night, stark awake, inconsolably saddened.